Many days and nights I would find myself wondering "is this it?", was I destined to spend the rest of my working life doing the same job for the same company. We only have one life, therefore we should be happy with how we choose to live it.
I am writing this because I have no doubt that there are many people who have similar thoughts and therefore wish to give my story in the hope that others' will share theirs, no matter where along the path they are.
I am 33, just about to hit 34 and have worked for the one employer for the last 12 years. This employer was basically my first employer out of University and college. I can’t say that I ever planned to move into the world of Underwriting. Even when I had to choose a topic to study at Uni and college I really had no idea what I really wanted to do so I picked something that I thought I would be good at, not necessarily something that I would enjoy. I guess, I fell into the job which became a career.
Around the 8th year I felt that my interest had disappeared. I was bored with the job, and frustrated with the lack of opportunities that one experiences when they are not in the Head Office. This made me feel depressed. I was really over it, so I handed in my resignation to pursue an interest in film making. My manager however talked me out of it by offering part time work which would allow me the scope to pursue film making whilst still earning an income. I spent 12 months studying, and making a couple of not so good Indie Films. It was good to have the freedom, but I also was realistic that I would not be making an income from film so needed to seek full time work. Nonetheless, it had given me a mental break from the daily grind.
A position came up in another department at work so I took it. I spent two years in a fraud prevention role and then I moved into a newly created senior underwriter role. My motivation to move back into underwriting was not only as a career progression step, but also to help provide a smooth transition into the office for the soon to be appointed underwriting team leader.
Over one year has now passed and whilst the transition was smooth and I have developed a great working relationship with my manager, I was again asking myself in no particular order;
- “Do I want to stay employed as an Underwriter until retirement age?”
- “What are my real interests?”
- “Can I gain employment in an area that interests me?”
- “How do I get there?”
- “Where do I want to be in the next 5-10 years
- “What else does the world have that I want to experience?”, and most importantly
- “If I leave to re-educate myself, do I have enough funds saved to keep me going? ”
However, when I woke up to go to work on Monday 27th March, I made the decision – if I want change I must act. So I drove into work thinking “just do it!”. Over a morning coffee with my manager I advised him of my decision to resign.
After advising my manager of the decision to resign I had the following thoughts and feelings on the first day;
- Apprehension
- Numbness
- Unsure, have I made the right decision?
- Loss of good stable income
- The unknown, what if I fail?
- What happens if my studies don’t succeed and I go into a job that I don’t want to do? (Income less, not happy).
It would be great to hear about your experiences and thoughts so feel free to comment and share with everyone.
As I put one foot forward after another on this new path I will keep you updated with where the journey takes me.
